Monday, January 25th, 2021

How Increased Confidence Improves Appearance, Credibility and Influence


Confidence. Do you think about how much you have? Do you wonder if having more might improve your life experience? Confidence, and how much you have of it, is probably not something you think about on a daily basis, if at all. Why? Because you don’t know it’s a problem. What we experience as difficult or stressful and the reason we avoid places, people and activities is usually linked to a lack of confidence. Let’s think about increasing confidence. When you build your confidence you improve your appearance, your credibility and your influence.


Confident women look fabulous (even if they aren’t ‘perfect’ in media terms) because they pay attention to the details of their appearance. They dress to suit their unique personality, they don’t follow trends, they don’t worry about what people think and they wear styles that sometimes draw attention – and they don’t mind. Actually, a confident woman always draws attention because confidence is uncommon. A self-conscious woman will wear what she has always worn and is not open to change because she’s afraid of standing out or of what others will think. Confident women embrace change.


Confident women look amazing because they shop alone and don’t rely on the ‘good advice’ of friends to tell them what they should buy or how they should look. The confident woman has taken time and effort to go through a styling process and is sure that what she wears looks great on her. The self-conscious woman can’t shop alone and is dependent on others for advice, which is why so much of her clothes don’t feel perfect for her and are left in her closet unworn.


Confident women look great because they like themselves and most importantly, they like their bodies. They are grateful for their bodies and put time and effort into keeping them strong and in good condition. They don’t say bad things about their bodies and are appreciative of every part of it. Loving their bodies is a big asset when they shop because when clothes don’t fit well (fact: 95% of women need clothes altered) they know it’s the clothes that aren’t perfect, not their bodies.


Just think of how a confident woman appears because she is not hung up on how she looks. When she feels good about her appearance and who she is, she can concentrate on other things. This leads to credibility. How can you be credible if you don’t believe in yourself? If you don’t feel good about how you look you are unlikely to step into a new situation without feeling a little (or a lot) self-conscious. You won’t go to meetings alone; or, if you do it will be stressful because, ‘what if you get there too early and there’s no one to talk to, or too late and all eyes are on you’, or     ‘what if there’s no one there you know’? The self-doubting woman most likely will not find herself in situations like these without stress.


The confident woman can stride into any room and is happy that she doesn’t know many people because that means there are more to meet. She enthusiastically walks up to people she’d like to know and easily introduces herself. She has taken the time to learn social graces and is at ease in social situations. This behaviour enhances her credibility because no one will believe in her until she believes in herself.


Influential women are charismatic. Charisma is formed when high confidence levels are evident in body language, trust and warmth. The way we move (body language) – walk, sit and speak – reveals our inner thoughts and how we feel. Just think of a person who is unsure of themselves – they will walk, sit and speak with apprehension. Conversely, a person who is confident moves with grace and ease.


Confident people trust themselves – they are aware of their abilities, know their limitations and trust themselves to be who they are. Trusting oneself is a precursor to others placing trust in you.


Confident people display a feeling of warmth. They are fun to be around and are seen as approachable, caring and empathetic. Warmth starts from within – knowing, liking and loving yourself first.


Will being more confident improve your life? Absolutely! Even a slight improvement in confidence will allow you to do more, to take risks, to be rid of self-imposed limitations and enjoy life!


If you’d like to feel better, look better and enjoy more of life I challenge you to take a look at how you can improve your confidence today.


Begin by downloading my eBook and videos – 7 Steps to Boost Your Confidence Today!   

Create an image of influence

3 Ways To Create an Image of Influence

Create an image of influenceHave you ever thought of how much influence you have? Have you wondered how you appear to your new prospect, the job interviewer, your new date, or your audience? Your level of influence comes from the first impressions you make – how you build your likeability, credibility and charisma. When we first meet someone we instantly make judgments and get first impressions from communication and non-verbal cues. Those impressions are quick, subconscious and come instantly. When someone first meets us they quickly assess our credibility or trustworthiness; our likeability, if we’re easy to be around and our attractiveness, how well we are put together. All of this together is our image.

Your image is not just your appearance, although appearance is a big part. Image is how you show up in the world – that energetic feel people get when they meet you. I’m sure you’ve met people who you instantly like, others you don’t trust and some with whom you have a wait-and-see attitude. The thing is they all might be people you will like or even become friends with eventually, but if it takes time you might never find out.

In a situation where you want to create a good impression and you don’t have a long time to do it, it helps to know how to create an instant connection. The reason you might not be creating a good impression has nothing to do with the person you are but more to do with how you project your energy.

You’re always broadcasting your energy and others are tuning in to your energetic field first by your behaviour – how you move (your body language), secondly by how you communicate – how you sound and what you say and thirdly by your appearance – how you’re dressed and groomed. When all of these are put together you are sending a message that is either helping or holding you back.

So what does it take to have an influential image? To be really short and to the point, it takes being in alignment with who you really are and how you project your energy. To get you started in creating an image of influence, I will share 3 steps that you can take right now.

  1. Be yourself. This means being comfortable with who you are, not worrying if you’re good enough, not worrying if you’ll say the wrong thing or trying to conform to what someone else likes or wants. Being able to ‘be yourself’ comes from being confident – believing you are good enough just as you are. Trying to be someone you’re not is very hard work. If you feel tired and drained after spending time with a group of people you don’t know well or have just met, you are probably not being yourself. When you are being yourself you’re comfortable and authentic. You’re credible.
  1. Create a credible appearance. Do you dress how you want or are you afraid that if you dressed in a way that feels good and inspiring you might ‘get noticed’? If you are afraid to stand out, maybe you dress down wearing baggy clothes, dull colours and drab styles that everyone else wears, to blend in. That’s not very inspiring and doesn’t create authenticity.

Do a quick assessment of your head-to-toe appearance – how do you dress, how are you groomed? Does your appearance reflect your reliability? How would you describe your clothes – pressed, wrinkled, worn, matched, mismatched? Does your appearance reflect your brand? Is it how you want to be seen? Would you trust you?

  1. Show your confidence in your body language. How you move tells others how confident you are. Your movements or non-verbal cues indicate how you feel about yourself and how you feel about others. Simply by standing straight, squaring your shoulders and relaxing, you can automatically feel more confident.

To further show confident body language, maintain eye contact and focus on your listener, or if you’re the listener, focus on the speaker. There’s no quicker way to lose credibility than to half listen and move your focus to everything and everyone who moves around you while you’re ‘supposedly’ listening. Make the speaker the centre of your attention and don’t forget to smile. A smile is contagious and not only makes you feel better but those who are the recipients of your smile feel better. Even if they don’t return your smile they connect with your energy.